Riding the Roller Coaster of Grief: Loss and PTSD

The Roller Coaster Chronicles: Navigating the Twists of Loss and PTSD

Life has a way of resembling a roller coaster, and grief, well, it’s the wildest ride in the emotional theme park. As I delve into this journey of loss, it all began with the unexpected departure of my close friend, Kevin. Little did I know, his exit would set in motion a series of emotions, reopening the vault of pain from my dad’s passing 14 years ago.

Much like an exhilarating roller coaster, grief doesn’t come with a manual. It throws us into twists and turns we never signed up for. The loss of Kevin crashed over me like a tidal wave, propelling me into a tumultuous ride where emotions mimicked the unpredictable waves of the sea. From the sudden plummet into sorrow to the ascent of memory-filled hills, navigating the loop-de-loop of emotions, and eventually descending into acceptance — each phase unfolds as a distinct challenge in this emotional roller coaster.

Roller Coaster with hill, drop and loops

Loss and PTSD Duelling Roller Coasters

Therapist’s Revelation

In the therapy heart, emotions laid bare, she drops a bombshell – PTSD. Kevin’s loss morphs into a roller coaster of haunting memories, echoing my dad’s passing. My therapist’s aha moment propels me to explore the dance between present sorrow and past traumas. As PTSD’s weight hits, emotions take unexpected roller coaster turns, revealing the intricate layers of grief. The echoes connect with Kevin’s departure, intertwining with vivid recollections of my dad’s final moments. This revelation kicks off a profound roller coaster journey, nudging me to delve into the interconnected threads of loss and trauma, just like riding the twists and turns of my emotional coaster.

Embarking on the Tangled Journey

Loss and PTSD are like riding this duelling roller coaster. Each twist and turn steps into the other’s territory, creating this complex choreography of emotions. It’s like navigating a bustling amusement park. Every twist on the coaster brings up a memory or feeling. It becomes this delicate balancing act to avoid getting too caught up in the loops of the past. Picture riding that emotional coaster. PTSD is the unexpected loops. Kevin’s loss is the sudden drops. And echoes from my dad’s passing are the screams of the riders in the background. It’s a thrilling yet terrifying ride, with each moment unveiling layers of intertwined emotions.

Revisiting Traumatic Scenes 


So, PTSD kicks down the door to those heavy scenes from back in the day – that gut-wrenching phone call, the hospice room – and all those emotions I thought I neatly tucked away? Yeah, they came back like they were on a mission, hitting me like unexpected twists on a roller coaster. Now, it’s not just mourning Kevin; it’s like I’m stuck in this chaotic thrill ride of heartache, careening through the loops and drops, reliving the pain of losing Dad. Some days, it feels like I’m caught in this never-ending emotional deja vu, where the past hits me with a vengeance, and I’m just trying to navigate through the thrilling yet frightening waves of old hurts resurfacing.

Untangling the Emotional Roller Coaster


Untangling this mess feels like I’m on a constant thrill ride. I grapple with the echoes of a complex piece of music that hits me like unexpected twists on the ride. Each note is a memory. Every memory slams into me with the force of a surprise turn. And every damn chord resonates with a feeling, making this journey through the ups and downs of my own history a real white-knuckle ride. Writing about it turns into my way of venting. It’s my way of trying to put the chaotic coaster of emotions into a narrative that sort of makes sense. It’s like trying to capture the gut-wrenching loop-de-loops and sudden drops of a coaster.

Facing the Healing Ride


Handling this tangled mess is like getting ready for a roller coaster ride. It’s intimidating, but you just know it’s in the cards. Writing becomes my way of strapping into the coaster, ready to face the beats of grief and the haunting melody of my dad’s passing and Kevin’s loss. It’s not about perfect moves. It’s more about finding that chill rhythm that gently guides me toward healing amidst the echoes of PTSD. This thrill ride is where putting words on paper feels like grabbing the safety bar before the wild ride. I am fully aware that the twists and turns are all part of the journey toward peace. So, facing this tangled challenge isn’t just a hiccup. It’s like gearing up for the bumps and thrills that eventually pave the way to that much-needed healing.

Embracing Bumps and Thrills on the Path to Healing

In the whirlwind of emotions, Loss, and PTSD become dueling roller coasters, intertwining twists and turns in a complex choreography. As PTSD opens the door to traumatic scenes, the roller coaster of emotions careens through unexpected turns. I relive the pain of losing both Kevin and my dad. Untangling this emotional roller coaster feels like grappling with echoes of a complex piece of music. Each note hits like a surprise turn. Writing becomes a venting process, capturing the gut-wrenching loop-de-loops and sudden drops. Facing this healing ride is like gearing up for a roller coaster—intimidating yet inevitable. Embracing bumps and thrills on the journey toward healing.

This roller coaster of a series invites you to hop on the emotional ride, sharing the car as we navigate the loops and drops of grief together. Riding the waves of losing Kevin and reliving my dad’s departure, writing becomes the safety bar, guiding me through this roller coaster of emotions. Let’s make this coaster a bit less lonely by sharing highs, lows, and twists — a collective journey toward solace, connection, and healing. Thanks for taking a seat on this coaster with me. What’s your roller coaster story?

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  1. January 19, 2024

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